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See, that’s what the app is perfect for.

Sounds perfect Wahhhh, I don’t wanna
justmeandmymuse
catsbeaversandducks

“Wreck the tree and blame the doggie… Fa la la la la la la la laaaa!…”

Photos via >^..^< in a Christmas Tree

Source: catsbeaversandducks

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thoki4ever

Can we just talk about how hard Clint goes for Christmas though

oldmchawkeye oldmchawkeye

Look at the cute lil Charlie Brown tree he’s got

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(also how cute is it that Tony’s like “I’m gonna spoil you, you freaking mess, get in loser we’re going shopping”)

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and he wears the Santa hat like the whole time

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Like even when giving lame comebacks to tracksuit bros he’s still like “CHRISTMAS CHRISTMAS MOTHERFUCKERS”

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and he watches Christmas specials with the cute neighbor kids

Clint Barton is a dork for Christmas pass it on

transformativeworks
frodoes

what she says: i’m fine

what she means: the words “christmas tree” are used in the hobbit, and since we know that bilbo is the author of the hobbit, hobbits must have christmas which means there must be a middle earth jesus. but hobbits seem to be the only ones who have the concept of christmas which means it was probably a hobbit jesus. but frodo says in return of the king that no hobbit has ever intentionally harmed another hobbit so who crucified hobbit jesus?? were there other hobbit incarnations of religious figures?? was there hobbit moses?? did jrr tolkien even think about this at all??

maramahan

Wait wait I might actually have an answer

Tolkien wrote The Hobbit like waaaay before he even dreamed up the idea for Lord of the Rings, so when he DID dream up LotR, he had a whole bunch of stuff that didn’t make sense. Like plotholes galore

Like for example in the first version Gollum was a pretty nice dude who lost the riddle contest graciously and gave Bilbo the ring as a legit present and was very helpful and it was super nice and polite and absolutely nobody tried to eat anyone because this is a story for kids and that’s very rude

But that doesn’t work with LotR, so Tolkien went back and re-released an updated version of The Hobbit with all the lore changes and stuff to fix everything that didn’t work

This is the version we know and love today

BUT rather than pretend the early version never existed, Tolkien went and worked the retcon into the lore

If you pay attention in Fellowship, there’s a bit where Gandalf is telling Frodo about the ring and he mentions how Bilbo wasn’t entirely honest about the manner in which it was found

To us modern readers, this doesn’t make a ton of sense, so mostly we just breeze by it–but actually that line is referencing the first version of The Hobbit

The pre-retcon version of the Hobbit is canonically Bilbo’s original book. The original version with Nice Gollum is canonically a lie Bilbo told to legitimize his claim to the ring and absolve him of the guilt he feels for his rather shady behavior

Then the post-retcon version is an in-universe edited edition someone went and released later to straighten out Bilbo’s lies

So it’s 100% plausible that the in-universe editor who fixed up Bilbo’s Red Book and translated it from whatever language Hobbits speak was a human who knew about Christmas Trees and tossed the detail in to make human readers feel more at home, because that’s the kind of thing that sometimes happens when you have a translator editor person dressing up a story for an audience that doesn’t know the exact cultural context in which the original story was written

Tolkien was a medieval scholar and medieval stories are rife with that sort of thing, so like… yeah

There’s a good chance it maybe did cross his mind

scripturient-manipulator

@old-gods-and-chill LOOK AT THIS THAT’S SO COOL

wodneswynn

Not only all that, but Tolkien was also working within a frame narrative that he wasn’t the real author, but a translator of older manuscripts; so, in-universe, the published The Hobbit isn’t actually Bilbo’s book, but rather Tolkien’s copy of an older copy of an older copy of an older copy of Bilbo’s book. So when errors and anachronisms came up, he would leave them there instead of fixing them, and he may have even put some in intentionally; what we’re supposed to get from the “Christmas tree” bit is that the first scribe to translate the book from Westroni to English couldn’t come up with an accurate analogue for whatever hobbits do at midwinter.

anarcho-tolkienist anarcho-tolkienist

Yes. Another example of tolkien doing this is him using, for instance, Old High Gothic to represent Rohirric - not because the people of Rohan actually spoke that language, but because Old High Gothic had the same relationship with English that Rohirric had with Westron (Which is the Common Language spoken in the West of Middle-Earth). There’s tons of that stuff in the book.

anarcho-tolkienist anarcho-tolkienist

Like, Merry and Pippin’s real names (In Westron) are Kalimac Brandagamba and Razanur Tûk, respectively (to pick just one example of this). Tolkien changed their names in English to names which would give us English-speakers the same kind of feeling as those names would to a Westron-speaker. Lord of the Rings is so much deeper than most readers realise.

jumpingjacktrash

tolkein’s entire oevre is just one epic in-joke with the oxford linguistics department imo

Source: frodoes
novaknight
margaretmead margaretmead

Mai and Zuko got married, obviously, and the first thing Mai did when she moved into the Palace was adopt a cat. She named it “Your Honor”, simply so she could go around the palace shouting

“Zuko, I can’t find Your Honor! Zuko, do you know where Your Honor is? Zuko, you have to get Your Honor down from that tree! Zuko, Your Honor is terrorizing the turtle ducks again.”

korraquality

THIS HAS IMPROVED THE QUALITY OF MY LIFE

Source: siuilaruinismoving
bifacts
bifacts

Fact: Bisexual people in different gender relationships are basically straight, and bisexual people in same gender relationships are basically gay. Baking powder is basically flour so you can more or less use them as substitutes for each other. Tigers are basically large house cats and make suitable pets. Money is basically paper so you can get away with paying for goods and services using the A4 sheets you’d find in a printer. Pillows are basically just feathers so as a substitute if no pillow is available just rest your head on a live duck.

cheek-to-cheek-in-hell

does it need to be a bisexual duck

bifacts

Yes

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